Have mercy

I couldn’t sleep last night, due in part to an upset stomach, but aggravated and perpetuated by the fact that “Kung Foo Fighting” was stuck in my head.

Dear makers of ugly seersucker clothing,

Just make a flipping skirt, ok? Is that so hard?

“Indignance” is not a word, apparently.

Do you want to know how long the spell check and I wrestled over this one today, before at long last I realized that the noun form of indignant is indignation?

No, you do not. Trust me.

Apparently it’s Spencer and myself against the world on this one. I still don’t quite believe it, partly because I can’t believe I’ve never used the word indignance before.

Tell the one about your computer’s built-in cup holder!

Wow. Mad props to the Tribune for giving the task of writing up “fast takes on Web news” to someone who apparently is woefully out of touch with the ol’ tubes. Click to read:

I mean, really. I feel like someone just walked up to me wearing neon parachute pants and suggested we order some ‘za (totally rad!). Three of these five are hopelessly inane, and ought to be embarrassing. Let’s review:

1. Dell hasn’t used that slogan since its pitchman got busted for pot, which happened in 2003, unless they’ve revived it without my knowing. While it can be used effectively in relation with this story, this botched parody makes it sound like the author thinks the slogan is current.

2. Facebook has been open beyond college students for a pretty good chunk of time now (Sept 2006), and even before that, faculty and grad students could have accounts. So not only is the smirky teens versus grown-ups “joke” obnoxious as hell, it would have been inaccurate last fall even if slightly more appropriate and timely.

3 & 4. AOL and Larry King are fair game.

5. …. *gobsmacked* ….. Seriously, this lost wallet joke would have been old-fogeyish ten years ago. Leave it to Doug Larson, dude.

I take it back; I don’t want it to be summer after all

Big round of applause goes out today to whoever had this room before me. Specifically, whoever thought it was a good idea to throw a cigarette butt into the radiator. I’m sure that’s not the only reason the A/C makes my room smell bad, forcing me to keep the window slightly open in spite of the heat and gale-force winds — but today, I’m blaming it on you.

Thanks a lot.

eeeeeeeeeeee

The carpet in the hallway is wet and squishy! … And now my feet are sticky. WTF?

Oh, this little ol’ cloud? Why, it’s nothing, darling

Looking over the most recent posts, I’m seeing a trend, and it’s not a happy trend. I think I’ve hit a little bit of a lull this week.

• My thesis topic is turned in; the advisor has been dealing out curt, ego-undermining emails on a weekly basis; and a niggling feeling that now is not when I should be working on this topic has blossomed into a profound exhaustion.
• I still haven’t heard about my summer internship; it’s been something like two weeks since they were supposedly going to make the decision; I have an application in for school funding for an unpaid internship; I won’t hear about that until next month or so and I can’t stand to worry about any of this anymore.

A couple of other big effects:

• I’ve learned that love is not all you need. Yes, another hippie bites the dust. [*rolling eyes, kids; that’s called sarcasm*] I always thought I could just manage myself academically, and it didn’t matter if I had “the background.” I now have an acute understanding of the usefulness of prereqs, and why the rules do indeed apply to me.
• I have no ability whatsoever to predict grades or chances of success. My brain has been churning out possible outcomes on both of the above topics that range from World Fame! to a refrigerator box by the Fox River. Helpful little grey splat that it is, it also has provided totally rational and credible explanations for how each could come about.
• Apathy is frighteningly contagious. I’m feeling a little demoralized about everything else that used to be on my Things to Worry About list. The plan was to be super motivated on the smaller items once the big ones had gone. Ha, ha.

The good news is that my apathy has really only applied to things that involve my Future. The bad news is that I’m a Junior so everything pertains to the Future.

That said, here’s a quote from The Indian Empire (published 1858-1861), a history that includes a long account of the Mutiny. I thought this was hilarious, personally; I love it when historians get snippy.

Mr. Dorin [a government official] wrote a minute on the subject; […] “[…] My theory is, that no corps mutinies that is well commanded. If it should turn out that the officers of the 7th have been negligent in their duty, I would remand every one of them to their regiments.” This is a pretty compliment to regimental officers in general; perhaps some of them had their theory also, and held that no people rebel who are well governed. If so, they might reasonably inquire whether there were no means of “remanding” a civilian of sixty years of age; described as being “in all his habits a very Sybarite;” who “in no other country but India, and in no other civil service but the civil service, would have attained any but the most subordinate position;” but who, nevertheless, in the event of any casualty occurring to Lord Canning, would become, by rule of seniority, the actual and despotic sovereign of the Anglo-Indian empire. To return to the case in point.

Ha! It’s good to know that no matter what happens, Victorian authors will be there to shed a little light in my life.

Supposedly I’m going to hear about my internship today

Sign that my unbelievably productive day yesterday was just covering up a massive anxiety attack: I was up until 2:30 this morning, doing nothing and lamenting having too much to do and not enough time to do it in.

Sign that today will be a good day: Chocolate chip pancakes and tater tots for breakfast

Tea stymie

I was hoping to buy some milk at the shop downstairs, so that I could have some tea and also some of the cookies I have been hoarding for the purpose. However, all the bottles have the date “March 28” — this in spite of there being no milk available at all last night. This is very inconvenient, but it does allow for the above pun.

Shambles

Treating my wounded feet, I have discovered that there is no Neosporin in my so-called first aid bag. I repeat, I have NO NEOSPORIN. This is very inconvenient, as pretty much my entire game plan when it comes to nursing feet centers on the Neosporin.

Further inspection of the bag reveals that my once-impressive collection of bandaids has been severely diminished, leaving only a motley assortment of the odder varieties behind. Only this is more motley in the sense of “After I’ve eaten all the marshmallows, I will have only a motley collection of oaty things in my bowl” than “I and my motley crew of crack crime-fighters have rid this town of lawbreaking and injustice in less than a month.”

A disturbing turn of events, to be sure.